Not a complete list…but hopefully helpful

#1 – Find an attorney who WILL meet your needs.

All attorneys will tell you they will fight for you and your needs, but ask for their track record with similar cases.  Everything they say should be taken with a grain of salt.  Unless presented with hard evidence, don’t believe everything you hear or read about prior success.

#2 – Provide enough details about your case to your attorney EARLY in the process so the court has time to process it.

So in my case, the court wanted “exhibits” (thought this was court not a museum) to be put on display so they could be used as talking points.  I was unaware such a request was even made considering my attorney didn’t tell me about.  Although I did provide them with enough material to present my case, they failed to process them with the court to be used because they were not applicable.  Apparently they were…cost me a little in the end.

#3 – Pressure your attorney to follow thru with #2.

Enough said about that!

#4 – Try and resolve things before you head to court.

It will only speed up the process.  I tried this many times, however, she wanted to allow the judge to make her decisions which helped and hurt her during the hearing.  The judge quickly grew tired of the back and forth that he gave both sides 20 minutes to resolve the issues.  In the end, I got exactly what I wanted which could have been handled before being lectured in court.

#5 – Prepare for the future.

What’s done is done.  Time to move on!  My “demands” where basically to ensure I still had a life to live after it was all said and done.  In my mind she had taken enough.  I was not prepared or willing…to kowtow to anything else.  Save whatever money you can.  Be cautious though as this can be equally divided as well.  Luckily for me she did not come after any of it.  Although, I could have come after whatever she had as well.  It’s not wise to hide things from the court, but sometimes desperate time’s calls for desperate measures.  Think about what you’re willing to give up to ensure a successful future.  In my case, she failed to mention or come after anything I had established prior and during our marriage.

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