Almost a week left before the inevitable is here.  I’ve got so used to being by myself; I almost forgot that I was even married on most days.  The plane tickets are purchased.  Hotels reservations and an appointment with my lawyer have been made.  All that’s left is the battle.  Hopefully the final battle.  End Game!!!  I really hope these proceedings are cordial and fair.  I’ve more than then less have given her a free ride for the better part of over a year.  If it wasn’t for my children, this would have been over within a week…easily!  I just want what’s mine.

I’ve spent the last two weeks collecting and organizing every little piece of paperwork I could find to help my lawyer present my case against her for whatever she decides she wants to come after in a fair manner.  I guess the “real” learning will come after the judge makes his final decision before I can give any hard hitting advice going forward.  I already kind of know what she wants, but it’s going to be really hard for her to get what she asking for given the length of our marriage and the massive debt she rang up under my name.

I would be lying if I told you that I’m happy it’s almost over.  This divorce, by far, has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to endure.  It’s hard to watch the person you love, unconditionally, walk away from you without a reason or an excuse.  Not to say I’m perfect (far from), but there was nothing I wouldn’t do to ensure she was happy.  That is and was the honest truth.  If both of us weren’t going to give it our all, it was never going to work; however, I was willing to give it my all.  I’ve never quit at anything in my life and I wasn’t about to start now.

Now that is gone………….

I suppose I should have seen the red flags over the years, but I was in love.  I guess I was trying to be the person she wanted me to be instead of being true to myself.  Hopefully one day she cuts the umbilical cord from her parents and leads her own life.  They were the problem for the most part…always in her ear.

The rebuilding will begin soon.  Kind of has already.  I’m in a happier place now that I’m free of always having to walk around on eggshells.

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